Last year, I was taking out the trash one day (not that taking out the trash is an annual event for us – we do that quite regularly) and I saw that there are several people dressed in black with flowers around the entrance of the apartment building. “Ah..well, it appears that someone died” I thought “but who?” In Georgia, as in many Eastern European countries, the dead are still viewed for several days in the house. There is usually a coffin lid in the outside corridor ready to close the casket when they will take the body away. What was odd though was that I didn’t hear of anyone in our building dying. Nor did I see any coffin lid – then again, we live on the third floor so anything above us I pay little attention to. In fact, I pay little attention to 99% of our neighbors in general. Unless, I actually have a conversation with them and know their names, I really don’t care.
Anyway, after school, Maria (the 15 year old) comes home and asks
“Did you hear the news?!”
“I dunno, what news?”
“The neighbor died”
“What neighbor? I saw people outside, but don’t know which apartment they went to”
“Nukri” (a man we know on the top floor of the building)
“Nukri died?!!” I almost fell over.
“No, no – his mother or mother-in-law or something like that”
Relieved “oh…well, that is too bad.” I had no idea that his mother or mother-in-law was living there “Where did you hear this?”
“people are talking about it”
Upon hearing this, my wife gets on the phone and calls up her relatives (mother, sister, and niece) who all agreed to come over in the evening so we could all go up and pay respect to the family.
About 6pm everyone is at our apartment (mother, sisters, children, niece and husband (Giorgi), etc.) and has the women are getting ready, my niece’s husband, Giorgi and I are in the stairwell while he is having a cigarette. Then my wife rushes out and announces that we don’t have flowers.
“flowers?” I casually asked “why flowers? I don’t know who died. Let’s just pay respect and get out of there”
“No! you must come with flowers. It would be wrong not to”
“But that means running to metro stop to buy flowers”
“They still sell flowers now so you have time. You two go and buy flowers while we get ready.”
“ok, ok…we’ll go get the flowers. Not a problem”
So Giorgi and I go buy the flowers and get back to the apartment. Now, in Georgia (perhaps in other places, I don’t know), it is taboo to bring flowers for the dead into your own apartment. So Giorgi waits outside in the landing with the flowers, while I go in to announce our arrival and to hurry them up to get this over with. I go back outside and to wait with Giorgi and he quietly asked
“Did someone else here die as well?”
“I don’t think so, why?”
“Well, if Nukri lives on the 9th floor and the elevator works, why is everyone coming to pay respect taking the stairs?”
“Yeah, that is strange. Maybe someone else did die as well” and I go back in to see if anyone heard about this.
“Not that I know of” everyone answered.
Rather baffled by this, I jump in the elevator and go up the top floor where Nukri lives to investigate what the situation is. The doors open and there is NO ONE on the floor. Empty. No lights, no people, no open door, no coffin lid, nothing. “What to do now?” I thought. I mean I couldn’t just knock on the door and say “Word on the street is that that your mother…mother-in-law…or someone in your family is dead. Is it true? If so, my condolences” and leave. It almost sounds like a mafia threat.
So I go back to our apartment and announce my discovery
“No one is up there. No one at Nukri’s is dead”
“What do you mean?” my wife asks
“what do I mean? I mean they’re all alive!”
“Well, what do we do? We bought flowers”
“Yeah, the audacity of it. We buy flowers and these bastards kept breathing!” turning to Maria “Who told you that Nukri’s mother-in-law died?”
“No one told me”
“WHAT?!” jaw opening and leaping back. I began to feel my blood pressure rise “What do you mean, no one told you?”
“People were talking and I overheard them. I thought they were talking about Nukri’s”
“Doh!” slapping my forehead “Well then, WHO the hell died?”
“I don’t know”
“Well, go find out!”
This is when Giorgi –still in the landing holding the flowers – pops his head into the corridor and says
“The 4th floor! Someone on the 4th floor died”
Turning back to my wife “who lives there?”
“I don’t know. I’ve never spoken to them”
“Well what do you want to do now?”
“We could go and give it to the dead person’s family and pay respect to them” she suggested
“What?! Who died though? We don’t know who died or their family. We’ve never spoken a word to them. You want to go to a house of people we don’t know, who don’t know us, and give them flowers and sit and talk? What are we? Macabre thrill seekers who randomly go to strangers houses to view dead bodies? Should I bring the camera as well?”
“They are a neighbor. We should pay respect. Plus we have these flowers now.”
“What neighbor? We don’t know WHO died. Pay respect to WHO? I’m not going there.”
“But you’re dressed for it”
“I can undress. Have Maria run up and give them the flowers. She started this mess”
“She’s only 15. She can’t go”
“If you want to go, you go. I’m not going”
“Well, we need to decide who should go”
“What? We need to “draw straws” to go to a viewing of someone we don’t know?”
“We have the flowers. Anyway, we won’t be long. We go in, pay our respects and leave.”
“Look, I don’t care who is going as long as it isn’t me. I’m not going”
So there I sat, in some stranger’s apartment with my wife, my mother-in-law, and my niece, looking at some strange corpse and wondering when I would wake up from this surrealistic nightmare. I’m not really sure if the forced whispered small talk with the deceased’s relatives (who not surprisingly were equally shocked and confused to see us) alleviated or increased the awkwardness of the situation. Regardless, life’s little lesson that week…the phrase “people are talking about it” is not a legally binding term. It is not “factual” nor is it usually accurate. It is however, overused and can create a great stir in a matter of minutes. So check out all the facts of a teenage girl BEFORE acting upon them.
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